I’d noticed Kerry over the years at our gym. After being a college athlete and being 6’6″ and anywhere from 225 to 240 pounds at any given time…I’m not used to people I consider bigger than I am. While several inches shorter than I am…Kerry  is probably two of me…he’s a power lifter. Kerry is one of those guys that you see other people get nervous around. It probably doesn’t help that he might not LOOK particularly polished as when he is the gym is it business time. The haircut and tats on his face don’t help either. I would venture to guess that Kerry led a rough and tumble life at one time.

So over the years I’ve always noticed Kerry  and at some point in time this year, we started a conversation. Ends up, like myself, Kerry is a small business owner. From that initial conversation a genuine friendship began where we run into each other at the gym once every week or so and chat for a moment or two.

Kerry has that wisdom that comes from someone who (my guess is) fucked up at some point in time and had the chance to make it right. He spends a lot of time doing what he came to help local charities (when not lifting ridiculous amounts of weight and running his own business).

One of the interesting parts of Kerry is he just has this funny way of looking at you…that he just kind of knows what is going through your mind…maybe it is the Apache blood…I don’t know. He isn’t someone I would ever consider bullshitting however. Today we talked about flying and particularly my fear of it.

When asked why, my response was, “If I die because of someone else’s fault, something I can’t control…that will piss me off. If I die because of my own fault, than I can’t really get mad”.  Kerry gave my one of those looks and in his oddly polite way of speaking said, “the problem is you” while poking me in the chest…which means it rocked me.

Kerry went on to offer the thought that, when it is your time, it is your time. You aren’t going to know when it was coming…none of us can predict the future. In worrying so much about something that is out of your control, that becomes your focus in life….not living. Kerry’s theory was that when you get on that plane to enjoy yourself…and when you safely land, kiss the ground, thank the Lord (or in his words…if you don’t believe…than whomever).

Don’t worry about what you can’t predict or control. Live with what you do have, you do know, and what you can effect. Wise words applicable to just about every one of us.